you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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