Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
