I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
