sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
