Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
