i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize