Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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