12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize