WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
