Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
youre lurking in front of me
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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