After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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