Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I believe in your delicious
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Randomize
