There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize