So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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