Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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