so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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