Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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