I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize