Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize