atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
