Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
