the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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