Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
