Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
