The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
