i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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