Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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