I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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