does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
