I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
