"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just pee around me
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Randomize