as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
