Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
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