The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
