69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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