The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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