somebody snuck up and got me drunk
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
