I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The best revenge is premature balding
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
