i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
