put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
