i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize