when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
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Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
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The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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