I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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