Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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