ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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