We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
