Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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