Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
