so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize