i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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